CHAPTER 21 (part 1)

THE ALCAIDESA YEARS. 

In 2004 I finally retired from the retail fashion trade.
I had started working in the family business at the age of 14, part-time, then full time at 15. In all I did 44 years behind the counter.
I cannot complain since, as the saying goes:
"If you love the work you do, you never have to work a day in your life". Despite some very hard years, all in all, I had enjoyed those 44 years which ended up in my closing our two remaining shops, TEO and SWEATERS, in La Linea.

There were various reasons why I took that decision. I was 58 years old then and still in good health, but the fashion industry was changing much faster than I could adapt to it. Especially as a buyer, I saw myself losing my touch as well as my enthusiasm for the high-speed tendency in fashion, fashion which to my mind, was deteriorating and repetitive. I was in Madrid with my second wife at a Trade Fair in February of that year and a young salesman was offering me the latest style in jeans.... Flares!
I know I showed my age when I smiled at him and said:

" I've sold these in the 60s, the 70s, the 80s ... This is just a recycled fashion."

The young man was a bit deflated. He was probably born in the late 80s and fashion history was probably not his forte.

That was when my wife smiled at me patronisingly and said:

"David, look around, most of these sales people are so young they could be your grandchildren!"

I assure you that my divorcing her 6 months later had nothing to do with that remark!

My Dad had died 6 years earlier, the Big C finally caught up with him after 6 and half years and many a losing battle. Since my mother was elderly too, it fell upon me to be his escort and carer during his many treatments at the Royal Marsden Hospital in London. Incidentally, I have only praise for the Marsden about the treatment Dad received both medical, surgical, palliative and in every other way. Everyone there does sterling work and are exemplary.

How can I not mention the old Calpe House too?
We stayed there several of the long periods during which Dad underwent the intensive treatments required. It was a “home away from home”.
Coming back from a treatment, Dad & I, and seeing other Yanitos whom we knew, some well, other just by sight, was medicinal in itself.
We often say “I am proud to be Gibraltarian” … but not really having done much to be proud about our home town. Yet Calpe House must surely rank as the crowning altruistic achievement of our times.

Those six and a half years changed me.
I must admit I was rather conceited about my business successes, as well as my survival from catastrophes, all undoubtedly thanks to the Almighty who gave me the wherewithal to achieve this. And during those years, vanity crept up on me surreptitiously. I sported a gold watch, gold identity bracelet, gold necklace, gold signet ring with my family crest .....
I cringe at the memory of this even as I write these words.
Marsden gave me a crash course on reality, on true values, on Life itself. One day, sitting at the bedside of my father, working on the portable computer on my lap, I stopped working and looked at his sleeping form. It was then I realised something I will share with you now, which you will either understand immediately …. or  perhaps never understand it at all?

"Whatever you can buy and sell .....has NO VALUE!"

The realization was so powerful I could no longer bear wearing the symbols of my own vanity. I took off all my jewellery and swore never to wear gold again, never to think so highly of myself as to believe I was better than anyone else. What HAS value in life is health, family, love and compassion.

You cannot buy that; nor can you sell it.

That day, when Dad woke up, I embraced him in a new way, a cleaner way, the way that translated to him the love I had for him and the appreciation for everything that I was, the seeds of which he had planted. I could not wait to get back to Gibraltar and do the same with my mother and with my children. This was 22 years ago (at the time of writing this chapter, 1995 I think) …  and I have never worn jewellery since, not even an expensive watch, nor drove a flash car, nor expensive branded clothes. To this day I endeavour to work on humility …. I think I may have achieved a modicum of modesty … humility still escapes me alas.

But I digress.......

, in 2005 I moved to Alcaidesa where I had a modest, no-frills, two-bedroom apartment...." far from the Madding Crowd" as they say. I needed that. I needed my tranquillity, I needed being in touch with nature, I needed to understand myself better …….and I needed to write.

Despite two marriages and two divorces, for which I accept 50% of the blame, I remain an addicted romantic. I met an exquisitely beautiful lady in her 40s who was going through a divorce yourself. Misery loves company so they say, but in this case, it was her beauty that attracted me.... and I was off again! I do not remember a time when I did not write and that includes poetry, but "Danae" as I called her, pulled out all the stops in me.

Why "Danae"?

Take a look at the painting of that name by Gustav Klimt, one of my favourite painters. Early morning, as dawn broke over the Mediterranean horizon I got up and looked at her sleeping on our bed …..  and in my mind, the “Danae” of Klimt’s painting was lying there by my side. The relationship was not smooth sailing since I was recovering from one divorce and she was battling in another. One morning she caught me writing a poem and asked to read it. To my great chagrin, she smiled politely at my "masterpiece" and said:

"No esta mal..." (Not bad)

OUCH!
Did Byron or Keats, Neruda or Machado ever received such a condescending comment?
Ha ha ha ....no, I know my limitations and they are many, but her comment intrigued me.

"No te gusta la poesia?" (Don’t you like poetry) I asked.

"Si ... I love poetry and like writing it too"

I rose to the challenge, what else could I do? and asked her to show me one of her poems.
The next day, she did.
OOPS!
It was good!
No, …… it was very, very good!
It was modern in the sense that exact rhyming was not a priority to her, but her grasp of the language of Cervantes left me in kindergarten by comparison.

(Que verguenza!) How could I salvage this embarrassment?

I am nothing if not a salesman, so, quick as a flash, I explained that mine was not a poem but the lyrics for a song that I had decided to write about her.
SNAP BANG! I had regained my footing ... or for now at least.

What did I know about lyrics?
About writing songs?
About music?
I could barely strum the opening notes of “Doce Cascabeles lleva mi Caballo" on a guitar.

Enter "Levi (the Lawyer) Attias"

Well, not literally. Levi is a highly talented poet and good friend and I showed him the poem for his consideration.  
No, MY poem ... I already knew how good hers was!

"Que bueno, David" was his opening comment. My confidence was being restored.
 "Take it to Denis Valerga and he can compose music for it, he is very talented. He has already done several songs for me"

This was excellent advice and as Denis also lived in Alcaidesa at the time, that evening I armed myself with the poem and a bottle of Merlot from the Golan Wineries of Israel, and knocked on his door.

This was the start ….. no, the rekindling.... of our friendship, and the start of a joint venture lubricated by many a bottle of wine which drowned the shared feelings of an impossible love which Dennis too, had known.

This was the poem that started our many evenings in the peaceful setting of Alcaidesa and culminated in our CD "DANEA - Canciones de Amor

DANAE ©

 

Te apodé… "Danae"

Al verte dormida en mi cama

Tu cabello adornando tu rostro

Tu muslo …..de la sabana se destapaba

 

Pintada por Klimt mientras tú

Dormía en brazos de Morfeo

Más dormida o despierta…….

Con toda mi alma te deseo

 

Hoy no hay quien te vea

De mi busca esconderte

Y en Parada y en Paseo

Se te ve siempre ausente

 

Que temes, Danae?

Tal efecto te causa

Que al ver mi rostro

Tu corazón se pausa?

 

Es que dudas tu decisión

De cortar por lo sano?

O quizás deseas volver

Conmigo….. mano en mano?

 

Erótica y sensual

Despierta o dormida

Danae, te amaré

Mientras yo tenga vida

For the braver ones, here is the You Tube link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=

All in all, we put together 10 poems which started with the beginning of the Danae affair – “La Mentira” - and ended with its inevitable demise – “El Ultimo Adios”.
Both Denis and I are dyed-in-the-wool fans of the late Leonard Cohen and so it was inevitable for the style of the songs to follow closely the music and singing style of the Master himself, though in Spanish .

Needless to say, she herself, my own Danae was chuffed!
In all honesty I too was over the moon. It is one thing to write a poem which speaks of intense feelings within me; it is quite another to hear the words set to music by a composer of the expertise of my friend Denis. It is no surprise that he has worked and continues to work closely with the most famous Gibraltarian of them all in music, Albert Hammond himself.

The whole venture lasted for longer than the affair itself. The latter ended when the madness of her midlife crisis run its course. However as the long-term friendship with Denis continue to grow …..as long as his beautiful friend Lone continued to be the excellent hostess with the mundane pizzas I would bring to accompany the excellent wine .... what can I say? At the end of each evening, the company and the wine made every song even more beautiful than we could ever have imagined at the time.

But I do not do things by half.
Riding on the high of the finished CD, I went to my friend Toby, then managing the Rock Hotel, and he kitted out the Blue Room as a miniature Concert Hall. Denis brought in a Spanish singer to do the choruses and he set up the speakers, microphones, amplifiers and incredible paraphernalia that are "de riguer" for any musical performance these days. I took care of stocking the bar with a light sparkling Bartenura Rose and Lone (pronounced Lo-neh)
 provided and added the final touch of a rose for each lady that attended presentation of this CD.

I must admit it was presumptuous of me, but the excitement of creating jointly this CD with Denis was such a joy that I wanted to share it with my friends. No, if you're wondering, Danae never attended, nor have I heard from her since. Much to my surprise the genuine comments of praise by the audience, despite it being composed of about 50 or 60 friends and their wives, was worth the expense and the trouble.

So much so that a few weeks later the late Lewis Stagnetto, who only recently has passed on, far too young, and his wonderful wife Anne Langdon Stagnetto, agreed to duplicate this in the classy restaurant they had in Spain. If it was good at the Rock Hotel it was indescribably better, more intimate, more fun in their restaurant. I am forever grateful to both of them for their support and encouragement.

As a footnote, and to be honest in these snapshots of my life, if I should mention that the success of these songs within the affair pushed me to take a step too far. Danae and I had visited the Thyssen Art museum in Malaga and in a moment of utter madness, I offered to paint a portrait of her.

"Pero ... tambien sabes pintar?" ("But ... don’t tell me you also paint?")

I set up the spare room in Alcaidesa with a sumptuous armchair on which I draped a curtain of red velvet and gold embroidery. I had Danae pose for me, nude (is there any other way for such a venture?) full frontal, looking fixedly at me with her piercing blue eyes. That was when I realised I had ....N.P.I.  (in English N.F.I.)... how to proceed. But proceed I did, pencilling in the bare outlines and not allowing her to see the mess I had drawn. I also took an iPad photo of her and covered my fiasco from her eyes when she dressed and then we had dinner. It took me a week to raise the level of the sketch to that of just under the lowest cast-off by the worst of any Picasso student. Why did I not pay attention in the art lessons of the late Mr Hermida, my arts teacher in the grammar school! ! !

The dreaded day arrived and I primed her with red wine and much talk of the wonderful style of Picasso, who, between you and I, is definitely not my favourite painter..... far from it! When I thought she was unfocused enough, I drew back the cloth covering the portrait and she stared at my …...(What is the opposite of "masterpiece?) ….

"Hhhmmmm .... " she took another sip wine, looked again and turned to me: "Porque me has pintado el pecho tan caido?" (Why have you painted me with my breast hanging like that?)
There are times when I could bite my tongue off ... this was one of them ... unthinkingly I replied:
"Because that is how they are."

Do you think there is any link between that evening and the ending of the affair a week later?

  I leave you with that sad thought......or cruel snigger.... till the next chapter….

















Comments

  1. You know I love this story David. The self deprecating pathos. Brilliant!....but it now begs the question; is the photo of the blonde lady , is that the lady in question?

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